Take a few seconds and consider containers. I know this is starting off really weird, but stay with me! I want to jump straight in and get right to the point, no chaser. You have all different kinds, some large, some small. Some have lids, some don’t. Some hold things well, some don’t. It doesn’t matter the make-up of the container, it’s purpose is to “contain” things. To hold stuff. Whatever is in the container, is all you can retrieve from it. It can only give back to you what you have put into it.
Now, consider yourself to be a container. Again, WEIRD, but hold on! When you are born, you are an empty container. Not yet filled with anything. As you grow and go through life, that begins to change. And because all of our lives are so remarkably different, the contents of our containers will be different. Initially, our experiences help to determine the contents of our containers. Some of us had wonderful childhoods, with only a few negative experiences that found their way into the container. For most of us, our containers were initially being filled with love, patience, guidance, discipline, faith, mixed in with a dash or two of disappointment, grief, fear, and low self-esteem. For some of us, that dash or two may have been more like a steady pour.
It would be completely wrong to assume that everyone had a childhood like mine. I know that isn’t the case. But, here is where things get interesting. In the beginning, it is our parents, guardians, family, teachers, coaches, job to help shape what enters the container. This is why the tribe is so very important. But, at a point, and this point is a different mark-in-time for everyone, the choice becomes yours to decide what gets put into the container and what goes in the trash.
This is so very important, because just like a Christmas gift that you really don’t like or have no use for, we like to hold on to our bad contents. We place them in the container, instead of putting them in the trash. And we have no use for it, it doesn’t do us a bit of good. And we think that if we bury it deep into the container, it will get covered up by everything else, then we don’t have to worry about it. And it’s safe there…for a little while. The problem with putting our negative junk in the container, is that it won’t stay there. Eventually, it gets re-gifted…just like that really bad Christmas present. Don’t re-gift it. Take it to the trash.
When your container is filled with hate, and hurt, and regret, and shame, and fear, and worry, it will be what you have to give. When you fill your container with faith, and hope, and love, and joy, and compassion, it will be what you have to give. Whatever you fill yourself with, will be what flows out of you. Students, nurses, teachers, parents, coaches, friends…take a minute to reflect. Take some time to ask yourself what is in your container that needs to go in the trash, that way you can free up some space for good. So, friends, I have to ask…what’s in your jar?
Be free,
A.G.
